It is all intended to help, but does it. Does pushing yourself or your child to always do more do more do more really accomplish what you want.
In another story of my readings, I recently came across THIS article form KQED's MindShift talking about stress in students. How the amount of stress one is under - and moreover, expresses - is a sort of "cultural currency". What?!
I get it, though. When everyone is connected 24/7, how else are you going to keep up with the jones' unless you are equally stressed out and complaining about it? How else are you going to get into a "good" university if you don't push yourself to the max?
Though also, how are you going to function in a healthy and positive manner once you get there?
“But too much stress has many effects on the body and mind, Alvord says. In the short term it can cause anxiety; over long periods of time, elevated levels of stress hormones can degrade the immune system, cause heart problems, exacerbate respiratory and gastrointestinal issues, and bring on chronic anxiety and depression." and "Colleges are complaining that kids are disengaged, they’re dropping out, taking a long time to graduate. It’s not developmentally appropriate for them to work so hard."
Both quotes from the above referenced article, and so true. I see it in my high school students, and I've seen the change over even the last five years, let alone the last eight to ten years. It's crazy. It also reminds me of the book "How To Raise An Adult", by Julie Lythcott-Haims, that I have been reading - which I will link to below. Over parenting and doing to much for our students/children, while also expecting too much from them, is just unhealthy.
It prevents the students from having the opportunity to figure things out for themselves, to experience their life for themselves, and to enjoy the time they have.